Fast Food Items That Would Also Work As Poorly Chosen, Vaguely Off-Color Pet Names For Sweethearts

Drawn from the last few weeks’ worth of direct-mail coupons to show up in my mailbox:

  1. Little Thickburger
  2. Tender Crispy
  3. Chicken Basket
  4. Macho Beef
  5. Big Country Breakfast
  6. Vanilla Shake (Large)
  7. Nibblers
  8. Quad Stacker
  9. Sirloin Dip
  10. Triple w/Everything
  11. King Oreo
  12. Superstar with Cheese
  13. Chicken and Biscuit Bowl
  14. Double Meatball Marinara
  15. Caramel Moo-latte
  16. 6″ Meat Lover
  17. Onion Petals
  18. Hand-Dipped Strawberry
  19. Enormous Omelet
  20. Monster Biscuit
  21. Sack Of Fries

I do love me some small-town livin’.  And yes, we’ve been reading McSweeney’s again.

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2 Responses to Fast Food Items That Would Also Work As Poorly Chosen, Vaguely Off-Color Pet Names For Sweethearts

  1. Kit says:

    That’s not accidental on their part, you know. The sexualization of food has quite a history. “Where’s the beef?”

  2. zyxomma says:

    How about Nuggets?

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